Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Are you playing full out? Are you ready to stop complaining and start living a life you love?

Take a moment to think about something you really want.  It can be anything from losing weight, finding a new job, making more money, healing a health problem, improving your love life or just feeling happier over all.  Do you have it in your mind? Just pick one, any one.

Now ask yourself if you have really been giving it your best shot? Have you been playing full out?  Have you been doing what you need to do in order to succeed?

Most people when asked that question answer, "no".  Why is it that even when we say we want something we have a hard time getting ourselves to follow through and take action?  Why is it so hard to change?  Millions of people buy diet books, pills, join gyms, hire trainers and declare that today is the day they will begin only to put it off until tomorrow once again.   Well whether it is about losing weight or changing any other area in your life it is important to be able to get yourself to do what you don't want to do.  You have to be able to get yourself to take action when the action may cause discomfort.  Yes you might be saying "duh".  So how do you do that?

Well after many years of working on developing the ability to break habits I have a few ideas for you.  Over the years some of the habits I have gotten myself to break are, bulimia, exercise addiction, lying, excessive coffee drinking, excessive artificial sweetner use, smoking, drug use and cheating ( as in cheating on in my relationships), just to name a few!

What I have come to realize is that there are a few very critical things that need to happen in order for any of us to be able to build the kind of inner strength is takes to change any habit or addiction we no longer want in our lives. You build this ability.  You build it every single day.  How? By getting yourself to do things you really don't want to do.  If you are wanting to lose weight you will have to get yourself to workout and change your eating habits.  If you want to improve your relationships you will have to tell the truth, be intimate, be vulnerable.  If you want to start your own business you will need to do paper work, get investors, write a business plan. If you want to be happy you will have to stop complaining, face your fears and take action, a new action. None of this is easy  but they are things that need to be done if you want to make a change.

So how do you get yourself to do this stuff.  It is not that you don't know what to do but how do you get yourself to do it?

1.You have to build inner strength. You have to be able to do things that are uncomfortable and one way to get yourself to do that is to be very clear why you are doing it.  Do the things you don't want to do.  Make your bed when you don't feel like it. Go workout when you don't have the energy. Tell the truth when you are afraid to.  Choose a healthy food choice over a junk food choice even when you would rather not.  This inner strength essential to Thriving!

2. You must build self awareness. Once an action is a habit you basically sleepwalk through it. It is easy, effortless, mindless action. It will take your ability to stop yourself from doing what you always do and make a new choice, take a new action, have a new thought.  Self awareness is the moment you wake up from your sleepwalking and consciously make a new choice.

3.Keep the "why" very clear in your mind.  When you are about to give in, give up or make up an excuse as to why you will "start tomorrow" don't do it!  Just stick to your plan and feel the discomfort, the fear, the uneasiness and this time don't let yourself off the hook! Today is that tomorrow you have been waiting for. Why do you really want it? What are you giving up on by not following through? What will you gain by following through.?

4. Remind yourself, it is just a habit, you can build a new habit and if you stick to your new action for long enough it will become a new habit and you will soon find it easy, effortless and you will truly forget what all the fuss was about in the first place.  Ah! that will be freedom.

There is no way around it. If you are not willing to be uncomfortable and do what you need to do,  you will be stuck in you old habits and those habits will run your life.

Who wants to go to the gym every day? Who wants to choose fruit and nuts over m&m's? Who wants to feel the repercussions of telling the truth when you have been lying?  You have to make sure you know why you are doing what you are doing and know that it is not only achieving success that is the goal, it is who you are becoming when you build your ability to face discomfort for a greater good, a better life, a happier you and healthier you.  

You have to want it. You have to keep focusing your attention on the bigger picture and remember no one will ever succeed in changing their life without changing their daily routine or habits.  Either stop complaining about what you don't like about yourself and your life and take some action or just accept where you are and that you are not going to change that habit and focus on one that is more important to you and then go for it. Play full out. Put yourself on the line. Stop fighting to feel comfort when it means giving up on what you really want. Stop settling for second best when you are just afraid of failing, getting hurt or being disappointed.   

You have to build you inner strength. You can build it by doing things you don't really want to do and do them without complaining. Just do it.

I have put together a one day workshop on June 14th in NYC called THRIVE, not just survive! The day will start with an intenSati workout.  We will go over how to empower positive habits to improve your life and your body. Don't miss it! It will be one of the best sessions yet! If you are interested email amanda@satilife.com 

May victory be yours!
Patricia Moreno